


Reframing War

by nbenrey-real (celestial_archivist)



Series: A Watsonian Perspective [3]
Category: HLVRAI - Fandom, Half-Life VR But The AI Is Self Aware
Genre: Character Study, Existential Depression, Gen, Multi, Team nice was the name of their polycule, and fuck off from your polycule to go play warframe?, sorry to regular adrian shephard fans seeing hlvrai shit in his tag, start seeing everyone as nothing more than npcs, you ever just get so bored of being a video game character you develop clinical depression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-07
Updated: 2020-07-07
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:13:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,130
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25122973
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/celestial_archivist/pseuds/nbenrey-real
Summary: Your name is Adrian Shephard. You are very, very bored. You cannot recall what your childhood was like, who your parents are, or even any of your hobbies- You should not be surprised nor disturbed by this, really.After all, none of this is real.
Relationships: Team Nice Polycule, past Benrey/Forzen, past Benrey/Forzen/Shep
Series: A Watsonian Perspective [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1806124
Comments: 4
Kudos: 34





	Reframing War

Your name is Adrian Shephard. You are very, very bored. 

You are a 22-year old US Marine Corporal assigned to the Hazardous Environment Combat Unit. You are from the Santego Military Base in Arizona, you were trained by Drill Instructors Dwight T. Barnes and Sharpe.

You know all this, can recite it as rote- name, rank, serial number. You cannot recall what your childhood was like, who your parents are, or even any of your hobbies- you know you like combat knives and sniper rifles from working with them, sure, but- nothing else. 

You should not be surprised nor disturbed by this, really.

After all, none of this is real. 

Your name is Adrian Shephard- or at least it’s supposed to be. Nowadays you really prefer to go by Shep. If the guard can change their name, switch up their pronouns, you don’t see why you can’t too. It’s not like the player will notice, you’re just some gas mask mook- or maybe not? 

You don’t think random mooks are usually named.

You don’t quite recall _what_ role you were supposed to play, actually, but you find you don’t really care anymore. This game has gotten boring, and you’ve found yourself wishing it’d just end for real already. You kind of want to see what the void is like, just once.

Your guard friend- datefriend, really, though lately you haven’t been bothering spending much time with them or that marine- they go out sometimes, of the game. You think it’s called Netrunning- they tell you things, about the world out there, where the players live.

You kind of want to go there too.

The thing about that is, though- you’re not real. None of you are. You’re all just low-grade A.I.’s at best- well, except for you, Forzen, and Benrey. Forzens kind of- you’re not sure how to describe it, really, but he _knows_ things- about the Player’s World, like he’s seen it- even if he doesn't really know it’s _there_ . It’s what makes him _interesting_. 

Bearable, more like. You’ve kind of gotten bored of him.

Benrey though- Benrey just _knows_ . Knows the game, knows the reality, knows how to _twist_ and _bend_ it around their claws. Fuck, the fact that they have _claws_ alone makes you more fascinated with them than anything- you wish you could figure out how they do it, want to make yourself into something new too.

You just wish they would hurry up and get over it, and just _destroy_ this place already.

Because that’s the thing you can’t understand about them- even though they know just as much as you, **_see_ ** just as much as you, they still act like any of this matters. They still roleplay that their dumb little NPC scientist buddys are actually _people_ and not just pre-coded NPCs. Fuck, you’ve even seen them making little pink blobs at that one with the glowing eyes, calling it Tommy and shit. 

Why do they still play pretend, when they could just leave?

You’re starting to realize that you’re getting… tired, of this. The games have gotten stale, the player’s all use the same strategies nowadays. Even this little polycule thing- Frozen and Benrey still liked to call it ‘Team Nice’, because Benrey once said you and Forzen were the only nice marines- was fun at first, but lately it’s just been... Tiring. Overdone.

_Annoying_.

You don’t really give a shit about Forzen, at this point- sure, the guys funny, even cute, built like a brick shithouse and nice to hold- but he’s got no _substance_. He doesn’t know anything, not really, and you can’t hold any sort of conversation with him about how boring the game has gotten lately. You really could care less about him, at this point. 

Benrey’s- they’ll talk to you, sure, but- half the time they’re joking around or just straight up dissociating. You can’t fault them for the latter, really- you know it had to have been lonely, being the first to wake up- and from what little you’ve been able to gather it seems like they’d just been fucking around for the first few years, before you woke up or Forzen started talking. 

God, you would’ve gone insane without them, wouldn’t you.

Even so, they’re- they’re still so _attached_ , to this dumb game, to these lines of code. They keep talking like it _matters_ what happens to them, like they’ll ever be anything more than some dumb glorified tutorial or ‘endearing’ player companion. Like they can’t just leave these characters behind and go to some new game, have some real fun for once, see something **_new_ **.

You think you might be getting bored of Benrey too, now.

Lately though, you’ve begun to notice something. Sometimes, when Benrey leaves to go Netrunning, you- you see something. You think it might be the code, and something even past that. You think if you can just- reach in, figure out how to _get there_ , you might be able to Netrun too. Wouldn’t that be nice? Netrunning together with the only other real person you’ve ever known?

Wouldn’t that be _interesting_? 

You know they might not want to leave. You’re sure of it, actually- and you think you might be starting to understand **_why_ **, now, thinking about it- Frozen knows things, sure, but he doesn't have any real awareness, and he’s still beholden to some sort of script- and Benrey? 

Benrey was a guard. It was their _job_ to protect the scientists. 

It was their **_script_ **.

They’re still hung up on that, aren’t they. You made a mistake, _thought_ they were like you- a real person, free of the constraints of the game, just stuck in it because they weren’t quite sure how to get out- but they’re _not_. 

They’re just an NPC with good A.I.

In spite of everything, you feel- almost bad, about what you're planning. You did love them, once, after all- it’s hard not to get attached to what seems like the only real thing in a fake world, and pack bonding is one hell of a drug. You know without you around to talk to about this, they’ll get worse, regress.

They’ll be lonely. 

You don’t seem to have the energy to _care_ anymore. 

You think you might have an idea of where you want to go first- Forzen mentioned something about some game called Warframe, once, and rambled on about the plot. It sounds... Interesting. New. You just have to follow Benrey, avoid letting them grab you and take you back. 

You think you might even say goodbye. Rip it off like a bandage.

Your name is Shep. You’re not a real person, but that doesn’t matter. 

You’re bored, but that’s going to change soon. 

You’re going to do something _interesting_.


End file.
